The first date could be a fun and memorable experience. Apparently, it’s not as easy as it seems. There is a good opportunity for you to get to know someone; however, the experience could be nerve-wracking.
The good news is, there are ways to make your first date a pleasurable experience, not a horrible one. Do you want to know how? Then keep reading to find out 11 simple but effective tricks to prevent an awkward first date to make sure you make it to date number two.
Food for Thought: Thinking About Your Typical First Date Scenarios
Every relationship always comes with the first date. It could be in many forms, including, but certainly not limited to the following:
- A dinner for two.
- Dinner-movie-coffee combination.
- Watching a musical play.
- Going to a concert.
- A walk in the park or on the beach.
- An art gallery or museum visit.
Now that you’ve pictured what your first date may look like, here’s a way to get rid of your nerves.
11 Graceful Tips for Women Facing an Awkward First Date
1. Eliminate Your Pre-Date Nerves Through Distraction
You may feel pre-date jitters or get nervous hours before your date. That’s normal and it’s okay to feel that way. However, this could take a toll on your overall mood during the date.
Therefore, do your best to calm your nerves. According to Love Geist research, Londoners are twice as likely to hit the gym prior to first date, while those living in the North West are 95 percent more likely to apply a fake tan or go for a sunbed visit.
What’s the bottom line? Get rid of pre-date nerves by doing something relaxing. You may spend a few more minutes getting a hot bath, go to the gym, reading a book, or keeping yourself busy to stop you from over-thinking dating scenarios. The more relaxed you are, the better your mood and the outcome of the date will be.
2. Review Past Conversations a Day Before the First Date to Boost Your Confidence
Preparation is key in everything you do in life. This reduces errors and makes sure that everything goes according to plan. This includes first dates.
Aside from eliminating pre-date jitters, you can stop butterflies in your stomach by doing your homework and reviewing previous conversations prior to the date.
Perhaps you are wondering why.
Reading past messages, asking common friends, about the person or checking his Facebook profile will give you an idea about his personality. Surely, you can pick something from there, which you can use to keep the conversation flowing. You might even have something in common, which is a good icebreaker. By doing your homework, you will be able to eliminate dead air and minimize awkwardness during the date.
This next step is a no-brainer, yet it happens more often than you’d think.
3. Don’t Be Late on Your Date to Avoid Awkwardness
You might think that if a man likes you, he is willing to wait for you, no matter how long it takes. Apparently, this doesn’t work on first dates. It sends a signal that the date is not important, which can be a turn-off for most men.
What if you are caught up with something important?
Here’s what you should do if you can’t help but be a bit late:
- Make sure to call or text your date and inform him that you will be late.
- Apologize sincerely.
- As soon as you arrive, smile and don’t look haggard or grouchy.
- Offer your date a drink and explain the situation.
4. Dress to Impress: Ways You Can Wear the Best Outfit for Any Occasion
Think about this: your dream guy finally asks you on a date. You shop for new clothes and shoes, you have your nails done, and you even get a haircut to make sure you look your best. It turns out, he’s bringing you to a garden restaurant or an amusement park, which makes your fancy pumps out of place.
What can you do?
Looking the part is essential. However, you need to remember a few things to make sure you won’t experience any wardrobe malfunction on your D-day:
- Take note of external factors like weather, location of the place, and time of day when choosing date clothes.
- Choose an outfit that emphasizes your assets and makes you feel confident.
- Comfort is key, so make sure you are comfortable with what you are wearing.
- Go for a dry run, especially in your shoes, to avoid blisters and band-aid moments.
- Stick to the basics, not the latest trends.
5. This Topic is Off-Limits to Help You Avoid First Date Awkwardness
Conversation is crucial in first dates. The challenge now is choosing the right topic that will make the night less awkward. You can talk about various topics during the first date, like:
- Your Job
- Your Past Schools
- Interests and Hobbies
- Common Friends
- Favorite Movies and Music
So which topic should you avoid at all costs?
Apparently, previous relationships are not any part of this list. While ex-boyfriends made you a stronger, better and wiser person, your date doesn’t need to know what happened five years ago. This also gives you a false sense of intimacy.
Save the relationship history for a later date or discuss it in a gradual manner. After all, you want to break the ice, not shatter it to bits and pieces.
6. Reduce Awkwardness by Keeping the Conversation Light and Flowing
You already know that past relationships are off-limits during your first date. It gives mixed signals and sends the wrong impression about you. If you want a less awkward date, keep the conversation light and easy.
Here are some topics you should stay away from, at least during the first date:
- Political debates or strong opinions.
- Religious beliefs or dogmas.
- Sexual preferences or history.
- Money or bills.
- Your current social status.
- Your future plans.
Instead, stick to light and upbeat stories or questions without sparking any debate or intense argument. This is why doing your homework is crucial because you need to find a common ground to trigger a conversation. First dates are supposed to be fun and enjoyable. Relax.
Here is another must-have for your next first date, and thereafter, for that matter:
7. Not About You: Why Listening is Crucial on Your First Date and Beyond
You might be tempted to talk about yourself and share stories about your personal life. That’s fine. Still, keep this in mind: dating, regardless if it is the first date or the tenth, is a two-way process. This means while one talks, the other listens, and vice versa.
During the first date, it is normal to feel pressured by cramming every second of silence with a story or a question. You might feel the need to talk to break the ice and keep the conversation flowing.
Apparently, that’s not how first date should go.
Here’s what you can do: while your stories may be fascinating, allow your date to talk. There might be fascinating tidbits about his life that you can pick up and use to prevent the three-second delay. You could also learn something from him, which you can apply in your own life.
Besides, doing all the talking gives the man an impression that his voice doesn’t matter to you. It also makes him think you are not interested with what he has to say. Activate your listening ears and encourage him to talk and share something about his life.
The next first date rule is one you should never break.
8. Stay Away From Alcohol, So You Won’t Make a Fool of Yourself
You know the rule: Never get drunk on a first date. Since first dates are most of the time nerve-wracking, a glass or two of wine relaxes you and calms your nerves to make you more at ease. At the same time, alcohol is a good tongue loosener, which could help you both start a conversation. Alcohol is also a good way to determine the personality of your date based on what he ordered.
On the other hand, drinking alcohol on the first date can turn something beautiful into a disaster, especially if you had too much. You don’t want to trip, fall or puke or make your date carry you home. Too much alcohol also sends the wrong impression that you are prone to foolish acts.
Is there a way to stop alcohol from ruining the mood? The answer is yes. In case you want alcohol during the first date, here are some things you can do to avoid disastrous consequences:
- Take your time when drinking.
- Go for small sips and take your time.
- Keep track of how many bottles or drinks you have.
- Drink water or soda in between alcoholic drinks.
- Choose your drinks wisely.
- Go for the alcoholic drink you always drink and don’t experiment.
- Listen to your body cues. If you are feeling a bit tipsy, slow down or stop drinking.
- Stick to one drink for the rest of the evening.
The bottom line is to take it easy when drinking. You want your first date to be memorable for the right reasons in order to make it to date number two. Unfortunately, getting drunk is not part of it.
Read on to find out why you should balance your first date expectations.
9. Keep Your Expectations Realistic to Make Your Date More Relaxed
You already envisioned how your first date with your dream guy will go: A lovely dinner for two in a fancy restaurant, musicians serenading you and your date as you enjoy the meal, flowers on the table, wonderful conversation, and a sweet, passionate kiss to cap off the night.
In reality, things probably won’t go the way you want them to, especially if your date planned something else. There is nothing wrong with daydreaming, but make sure to keep your expectations realistic. In case the date didn’t turn out the way you want it to be, then that’s fine.
This leads us to the next key tip, which is one you should always practice.
10. Look on the Bright Side to Enjoy Your Date Night Even More
Surely, there are a million and one things going through your mind when going on a first date – the place, food, his first impression of you, how he looks, the way he eats, and the list goes on. You might find the food diabolical or the place tacky or not first date-appropriate.
That’s okay. Here’s why:
While there are many things you should be worried about, it is important to look beyond those worries and expectations and simply enjoy the night. Instead of complaining, remain neutral and polite, so you won’t hurt his feelings, especially if your date chose the place. Look on the bright side and compliment something positive, like the good lighting or efficient service.
In other words, simply enjoy the night and the first date for what it is – to get to know someone. Keep the date light and upbeat by encouraging conversation. Who knows, you might find something interesting about your date, which could lead to something better and more serious.
11. The Simplest, Yet Effective Way to Survive Your First Date
More importantly, don’t be anything but yourself. Don’t pretend to be someone else just to impress a guy. You want to make it to the second date without acting like anyone other than yourself.
If you are an athletic girl who loves all sorts of physical activity, don’t talk about how much you enjoy a lounging around in front of the TV all day, just because you know he does. If your date is into basketball, don’t act as if you love basketball, even though you are a football fan just to impress him.
Here’s what you should do:
Show up at your first date as who you are. Pretend you are meeting a friend for the first time. This will help you relax and lighten the situation, because you can be yourself.
Things You Should Remember
Your first date is an opportunity to get to know someone new. First dates are like a first impression. Once you mess it up, it could be difficult for you to bounce back. This will not be a worry for you if you follow these 11 first date tips.
If you’re thinking about the second date, be honest about it. Either you could tell him directly or drop hints like, “I enjoyed your company. I hope we could do this again next time.” On the other hand, be honest and still nice in case you’re not up for date number two.
Remember this: Honesty breeds trust and respect, which you can bring, in case you both decide to take the relationship to the next level.